Saturday, 3 October 2009

Reawakening Faith

Now that we are endeavouring to resettle at least for the next nine to twelve months, we are realising that, despite our efforts to travel light by disposing of quite a lot of stuff before leaving New Zealand, we still have far too much stuff for an English house. However, it isn't just the accumulation of assets that causes problems with these moves.

As I reflect, I realise that I had come to trust in the comforts of our New Zealand home and the certainty of having work. Although I now have work, it is only for nine months so I have to keep looking for the next position. We now have a roof over our heads but it doesn't feel like home. The sense of comfort has gone but we have too many possessions that stop us living simply.

I observe the canal boats and think of the release; the freedom to go where the canals lead. This has led me to think of the cycle journey vision (26 July) and what we would need to discard in order to be able to move freely around the country. I see that we have become settled people rather than travellers living in a confined space with limited resources. We are a people who have settled and who are used to collecting “things.” Some of these remind us of the journey already travelled but many are simply clutter taking up space that we no longer have. They act as anchors to make us settle.

As I reflect, I think about faith and what it means. Do we really have faith when we have developed a settled mentality? If our faith were threatened, would we let go in order to hold on to the comforts that we have? I suspect that my faith is really secondary to feeling comfortable and settled. My faith, like my New Zealand living arrangements, has its regular settled routines. Sure, I reflect and consider things but my faith isn't shaken or stretched very much. I may dream of the journey but in the end I want to be able to return to the security of a settled faith and life. My faith may have elements of a journey but in reality it is a place of settlement where there are few struggles and issues to face. Maybe my faith, like my life, needs a shake up so that I really learn what it means to trust and walk in faith.

Moving around the world with no certainty of employment is reawakening my faith. It is forcing me to consider whether I want to retain the settler mentality. As I write this, I am thinking that in twelve months when we may have to move on again, I want to have less of the clutter and an increased freedom to move where God might lead us. What will that mean? It will mean reconsidering what is important and and releasing assets so we are less encumbered by a settler mentality. Each day has to be another step in faith.

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